Should A Man Provide For A Woman 100%? Or is 50/50 Ok?

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All adults should have their own ability to earn money. It is not just about paying for yourself, but it is about self esteem and not base your relationship entirely on financial support. The reality is that to create a family and have kids, at least the spouse who will not be pregnant has to be able to financially support the family while the wife is pregnant. But it does not mean that women should start a relationship with the expectation that a man has to pay for everything.

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Love this video! So glad I found you guys, what a great couple!

Given the high rate of divorce today, put a percentage of salary into the family bank account is sensible. No woman or man should expect 100% support from their spouse. Money is a very difficult topic to discuss, but a reasonable agreement will keep the harmony in the relationship.

This is hard...my ex spouse abused me financially..so I’m a little jaded.

My favorite of your videos so far. Thank you, it was very helpful, and I agree! =)

I can agree on the 50/50, and even the calibrating based on life’s circumstances. The only instance I’m curious about is when the guy turns down paying all the time that it can be tricky. I think BOTH people should be protecting and providing. Providing that connection in the ways that we show up emotionally physically and spiritually, and protecting the relationship by checking in with each other to make sure both needs are being met, work together to redefine couples goals. I’ve had men look at me weird for wanting couples goal to help inspire the other become the person they are fully capable of being.

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My mother supported my family growing up because my father was a brilliant artist. But he wasn’t good at making money. But he was the most generous man, in spirit, in wisdom, in creativity. His value wasn’t from his ability to provide, he enriched our family in such an amazing way and he couldn’t have done that had he not been free to pursue his art.

You guys are brilliant. I know exactly which YouTube channel is propagating this idea that women must be provided for men 100%. But I believe your approach is much more real and practical. And you’re right - they have no idea what it’s like to raise a family so they can get away with saying it. Adaptability in a relationship is key rather than being rigid. Good job explaining the concept!

So glad I listened this is really good for me I had a real great need because my husband pays 100% And whatever you said about money was right nice to meet you too

If being a provider doesn't mean anything to you and your wife then why have you been her provider for ten years? What does it mean to the both of you that the man pays all the bills since it is the case for you?

Needed to here this, interesting

I think it all depends on what you have going on at home as far a children, illnesses and stuff like that

Also — I would rather be with a generous poor man than a wealthy man who is not generous at all in his heart. It isn’t about money. People have value in different ways.

It's not just about money. You have to look at the whole package. You can't just look at that aspect in a relationship. I would much rather have a hard working man that tries his hardest to make ends meet than one that is financially wreckless. He may not be wealthy, but if he tries his hardest to keep me happy, that's what matters most. This isn't just about a man handing you his paycheck and ignoring everything else. You have to connect with them emotionally, be thankful and provide a loving home for the family. He has to meet our emotional needs as well. Yes, men should provide financially but it's just not about gifts and diamonds. It's alot more than that. Its about his intentions with you and any future children yall may have together.

I think have a joint bank account. Keep a percentage of your income for yourself (clothes, shoes, personal items etc) , save a percentage and put the rest in the bank account. Same for your partner. Discussing about the percentage or not depends on the relationship and the couple in question. Then use the joint account for daily household expenses (bills, rent, child's education and needs etc).

Thanks for the discussion.That's what is important-an open minded discussion between both parties. :) I think the financial arrangement can be anything which 2 people in a relationship have agreed upon.Each couple's dynamics are different and so the arrangement would be different for each couple.And it can also change as the relationship evolves. In my case,the guy has always paid except on one occasion,I was asked to pay my share and I did so. Money is just one aspect and the most important things for me is how much both ppl can be authentic in a relationship and whether they have a good rapport with each other. I love the way both of you are able to present your side and even allow the other person to express themselves fully.David talks and Renee listens,Renee talks and David listens-it is a joy to see the couple dance and the mutual respect you have for each other's POVs. I also like your ideas on parenting and homeschooling/unschooling.I would suggest you consider adding courses such as parenting,homeschooling and connecting as a family to your current set of offerings-maybe not immediately but eventually.