I'm an Alcoholic...

was a black out drinker for 25 years 6 years sober now, just a day at a time brother, you can do it... I found my sanity and hope at the rooms of AA. What awaits you is amazing!

Very brave to talk about it friend. Much respect for you man to man. My wakeup call was about 8 or 9 years ago, blacked out and tore a cheap bathroom door off the hinges because I couldn't find the handle. Pissed myself on the couch. Rock bottom only hits this hard if you still care about yourself, your life and your loved ones. The hard part for me was learning to both cope and overcome problems without taking a shortcut by drinking them away but they were still there in the morning when I came to. I understand. Do it for yourself though please as doing it for anyone else will only add pressure to not let them down by slipping up. Binge drinking, functional alcoholic, daily drinking is all the same shit from different points on a troft. You're stronger than you think you are, trust me. It gets better the more time you put between yourself and what you're feeling while recording this, I promise.

Same mate.. I'm much better these days though. But the risk of becoming a hardcore drinker again will always be there. My half Brother died of liver failure due to alcoholism. It's clear by the tone in your voice you're now taking your issue seriously. All the best for the future and be thankful you have a supporting Wife. It really can be the difference between life & Death/

This video popped up on my feed. Must mean that I need to share. I too was where you are now. There comes a time when it's now or never. This is your now time and if you want it enough you can do it. Life will feel better in so many ways. All the best.

I drank at home so no one could see it, spirits every day in the end in a hopeless quest just to feel OK. It ended in hospitalisation a week ago and I fessed up to my family. One week without a drink is longer than I've gone for years. Like you I arranged help but there doesn't seem much available. All the best, you'll do it, I see you want it so you'll be fine. Time heals us well.

Thank you for your honesty. I hope you get help and find something in life that brings you happiness and peace. You’ve got this

Unfortunately we all need a wake up call. Yours was falling and hitting your face. 4 years ago my brother was drunk and a chronic alcoholic, he fell and hit his head, but he didn’t get back up. I wish you the best of luck and hope you can defeat this demon.

God Bless keep your head up brother you got this

I'm also an alcoholic my friend. Have been for years. I'm not a typical alcoholic ( if there is such a thing) as I don't struggle day to day to not drink. I go months without alcohol but if I have that first drink for a multitude of reasons I fall into oblivion for weeks on end. Bottles of vodka straight from the bottle, alone . Only leaving the house in a taxi to get more alcohol and cigarettes, straight home in the morning to start drinking straight vodka again. There isn't one second where I'm sober except if it's the middle of the night and delirium trems set in and the shops aren't open yet ( you can't get alcohol in Scotland before 10am ). I don't eat anything for weeks or shower, brush my teeth.... nothing. I just go off the end of a cliff and give up. The alcohol makes the misery bearable for a time. This happens to me about 5 times a year roughly and it used to be a lot, lot worse. Alcohol is this worst drug on earth. Don't beat yourself up to much, it doesn't make you a bad person and it doesn't make you selfish, it's not a party were having when we drink. There is help but you need the right help because most people don't understand it. I fill my life with being as good a person as possible. I cycle almost every day in the countryside, I eat really healthy . Everyone needs there on path out of it because everyone is different. My brother is a functional alcohol that is physically addicted to alcohol, that's different from me as I only need alcohol once I start, the idea of drinking most the time makes me feel sick because of how I drink. There is a way out mate, and you'll be surprised that even just a few weeks of clean living with a determination you start to see the world in lights again 👍🏼

much love brother get well mate

I'll be praying for you man, I've been clean and sober from alcohol and methamphetamine for almost two years now. I thought that I would never get clean and sober but here I am now. You can do this man, I believe in you. You'll feel 10 times better once you get help and get clean and sober. It'll be a long journey but it'll be 100% worth it in the end.

May God be with you brother as you find your way.

U got this man. Praying for u

Welcome to the club. Drinking, drinking to excess, doing regrettable acts, feeling shamed, embarrassed, and remorse, and then, the hangovers, anxiety, and depression. You don't have to drink daily or even monthly to have a reoccurring problem. AA is a great start; try reading This Naked Mind by Annie Grace. It''s a process, keep trying. I do. And you don't have to apologize for the "dour tone" I search for videos like this every time I fark up. This is a big help, so thank you.

Respect brotha. I beat my addiction through physical activity, the pain keeps my mind off the bullshit and at the end of the day, i'm too tired to get fucked up anyways! Goodluck brotha.

First step; admitting you have a problem.

I quit drinking about 6 or 7 years ago, because of a ton of reasons, most of them soul and life destroying reasons. My relationships were garbage and I my behavior was extremely reckless and dangerous. I basically had to be given an ultimatum by my wife to keep me motivated. And even when I failed a couple of times, I had that threat to help get me back on the wagon, because I knew that her patience had a very short shelf life after the hell I brought into our home. My physical cravings were a side note to my psyche, similar to you, but from my understanding, that's the norm. In AA they will tell you that your problem isn't drinking. Your problem is you. First, you should stop comparing yourself to others. Those people worse than you are potentially you if you keep drinking. Always keep that in mind when looking at and listening to other alcoholics. Also keep in mind that your brain is going to try and trick you into drinking. It will be your greatest enemy and threat to your life. You have to commit to not listening to it and reminding yourself that that voice telling you you aren't addicted or can have a drink is literally trying to kill you. If you didn't have a problem,, you wouldn't have to worry about these things and you could just have a drink. A drink would be a casual occurrence and not some obsession you have to trick yourself into indulging in or not indulging in. I can have a drink and walk away, but I don't because that will justify me having another drink some other time and that will justify more drinks and that will justify me becoming a regular drinker and then i'm likely ending up right back where I was. For me, the main thing is to just stop trusting myself and the inner voice that tells me to indulge in things that have proven themselves harmful to my well-being. Ultimately for me, the hardest part was getting through the bouts of obsessive thinking which was usually during the times i'd normally be drinking. During those times, I'd just keep reminding myself that it was a demon talking to me(i'm not even a believer, but it's a concept that works) and also it really had an impact on my ability to sleep. I couldn't sleep without drinking and for a very long time, I couldn't stay asleep for more than 2 hours. Even after working a 12 hour night shift, I couldn't stay asleep. Even after several years, the thoughts crop up to test me, but they are nowhere near as loud and strong as they once were. Mostly just feeble whispers now. I'm not condoning this in anyway, but I never went to many AA meetings. Not saying I had a better way or that it can't help, but I just absolutely hated the idea of being reminded every day of drinking. I already thought about it enough and didn't want to go somewhere to hang out with people to talk about it more. I'm also extremely resistant to sharing with people, especially strangers and the idea of a sponsor really turned me off, because there was just zero chance in hell I was calling a stranger in those moments when my brain was trying to kill me. I was either going to drink or not drink, with or without a sponsor. The choice was always going to be mine and I have no interest in what others have to say. Call it a personal shortcoming. Anyway, best of luck. You can absolutely do this, just always be conscious of the demon on your doorstep. He will spend countless hours trying to convince you to open the door and let it in, especially when you're at you weakest.

From the USA , I have been comfortably sober since May 2000 !

Sending you lots of ❤❤❤🕊️🕊️

Love ya man, keep working on it. Set boundaries for yourself and be hypervigilant of others' boundaries as a start to make the ones you set for yourself worth something.