How Insecure Attachment Affect Your Relationships
324,835
Published 2021-07-28
Secure
Insecure-Anxious
Insecure-Avoidant
The two insecure styles can be summed up as: anxiety about being abandoned or avoiding intimacy and closeness.
Here are four things you can do to improve your attachments.
1. Recognize your attachment style by examining your significant relationships.
2. Practice self-compassion.
3. Journal or reflect on your secure relationships
4. See a therapist for professional help with making this transition from insecure to secure.
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References
Rowe, A. C., Gold, E. R., & Carnelley, K. B. (2020). The Effectiveness of Attachment Security Priming in Improving Positive Affect and Reducing Negative Affect: A Systematic Review. International journal of environmental research and public health, 17(3), 968.
Mackintosh, K., Power, K., Schwannauer, M. et al. The Relationships Between Self-Compassion, Attachment and Interpersonal Problems in Clinical Patients with Mixed Anxiety and Depression and Emotional Distress. Mindfulness 9, 961–971 (2018).
Want to know more about mental health and self-improvement? On this channel I discuss topics such as bipolar disorder, major depression, anxiety disorders, attention deficit disorder (ADHD), relationships and personal development/self-improvement. I upload weekly. If you don’t want to miss a video, click here to subscribe. goo.gl/DFfT33
Disclaimer: All of the information on this channel is for educational purposes and not intended to be specific/personal medical advice from me to you. Watching the videos or getting answers to comments/question, does not establish a doctor-patient relationship. If you have your own doctor, perhaps these videos can help prepare you for your discussion with your doctor.
All Comments (21)
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The turquoise jewellery really suits you
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"All relationships fail until they don't"-Dr. Tracy Marks 👏👏👏
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I used get attached dangerously quickly and would give my all to someone. But after a few times of them not being the same, I feel like I have completely lost the ability to be attached.
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The algorithm finally got it right! I really needed to hear this today. I just started dating a really good guy and my anxiety about being rejected or abandoned was already starting to creep up. This video really put things in perspective. Thank you
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“Your fear of rejection can lead you to end relationships” I felt that lol
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What if the only secure relationship I ever had was with myself? I always get me out of darkest places, heal myself and tell myself "everything will be OK" Thank you Dr. Tracey
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I just found out about attachment styles. I have anxious insecure style in romantic relationships. I literally thought I had a mental health disorder because I was obsessed with men who had rejected me. Now I know to have more compassion for myself. ❤️
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I love how well spoken she is. Very clear to understand.
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I always feel like everyone doesn't like me and that they're just gonna leave me so sometimes I leave in advance. I end up having one favorite person and it feels like they're everything to me. It's not even romantically but it feels like there's no point in living without them around. That scares me though because what if something happens to them.
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My mother is insecure anxious, my father is avodant. Great combination of dysfunctional family, because they both are toxic and control freaks.
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Im definitely avoidant style, most of the time i want to be alone and I don't think or care about my significant other not because I don't love them but because im an introvert so i usually like being alone and independent.
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I wish you were my next door neighbor. I imagine sitting on my front porch with you sitting next to me, rocking in the rocking chairs, drinking mint juleps and discussing these dynamic, mind blowing topics you choose to discuss.
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I love your videos because you address possible “root cause” issues such parenting style and childhood trauma but tend to focus more on solutions. Thank you.
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Insecure anxious right here, separation anxiety since I was a toddler
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Been learning a lot about attachment theory this year. Glad to see more and more people talk about.
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This is one of my favorite videos of yours of all time. You clear research-based videos highlight so many fascinating topics. The work you are doing here on YouTube for mental health is important now more than ever with the discussion of Olympic athletes like Simone Biles and Naomi Osaka entering the global spotlight!!
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I'm a very emotional person so when I am going through alot of pressure or guilt, I would either cry for long periods of time and go to sleep. I would write down and then go to sleep or do anything to avoid my feelings instead of actually dealing with it. I noticed that this habit has affected my relationships aswell
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It feels like a big step forward to know that there’s an actual NAME for what I’ve been feeling and going through. I could never figure out how to help myself because I didn’t know exactly what I was feeling. I just knew this feeling sucked. Thank you!
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attachment theory is so important! glad that it's getting the attn it needs!
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My mother left me and my father when I was a little over a year old...I knew I’ve had abandonment issues and my insecurity in relationships has been devastating. I’m taking a lot of time for myself to try and reparent my inner child. Hopefully I can be a good mother to the inner child.
